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I fear that whenever I leave the house, the appliances and furniture are making plans on how to get me...?

Does your house do that to you. I don't know what they want from me. I keep them clean and well feed. Spend time with each one. Apparently it's not enough. They will be making their move soon. They've already hidden my ax from me and I broke my chainsaws a few minutes ago trying to juggle. What can I do??? The meds dont work

Public Comments

1. Looks like they hid your medication too!
2. They now have medicine for paranoia. You might wanna check it out.
3. The doll's trying to kill me and the toaster's been laughing at me again.
4. We must have bought our furniture at the same damn place!
5. did you see the movie the brave little toaster
6. It seems the meds are working just fine.. you just hide under your bed until those nice people get there to uhmm.. 'calm' you down.
7. I'll be honest with you, they told me what you've done to them and I can't say as I blame them. You should go and apologize to them.
8. mutiny!! sleep with both eyes open like a fish and use a spork for self-defense.
9. .Plan an all out assault with the windows and doors.
10. i think peewee herman had this problem with is playhouse once. chairy kept giving him snide looks and muttering threats under her voice and floory...oh man...you don't want to know what that guy wanted to do. with all the blood and the guts and the hoivin glavin. i'm gonna suggest you become peewee herman, well without the whipping out of little peewee in inappropriate places and the collection of questionable "erotic art", that is unless that's your cup of tea. adopt a childlike demeanor and worldview, don a gray suit and red bowtie and start building your breakfast machine now. good luck and i hope this helps.
11. Oh God, are you telling me! These machines nowadays...I swear my car is a prissy high maintenance b!tch! The PlayStation controller is hell on my thumbs and the refrigerator has been acting unusually cold lately? My advice: sleep with one eye open.
12. shoot them. mp
13. Seriously now, that's a bit crazy. If it really is true, call the police. I'm sure they know how to talk to a blender. I can't say that I know anyone that has crazy feelings like this. I gotta go, my coffee maker needs to use the laptop. He's e-mailing the president's espresso machine.
14. maybe you should let yours come over and play with mine...they just want to get out of the house...then maybe the toaster will quit burning my toast...